Nina's progress

The last two and a half weeks have been so busy for us. A week ago Friday Nina had to have a blood transfusion after receiving her chemo. She had a reaction to the transfusion. Last Friday she had a fever and after her blood work was completed, received a very strong antibiotic (the doctor wanted to admit her in to the hospital, but Nina's tears won and she came home with me). We did however have to make a trip to the emergency room in Orange County later that night due to Nina complainging of chest pain. We were there until the wee hours of the morning and she was once again able to come home with me. Nina has been having quite a few "dizzy spells". She gets very dizzy and jittery. She also had a problem with her vision and hearing for a few minutes one day. When she has these "spells" it is to say the least, very frightening for both her and I. On the outside I seem calm to her, but on the inside, I just fall apart. It is so much responsibility to take care of some one who has so many health issues. My heart breaks when she is not doing well. The last few weeks I have been struggling with my own depression. Lots and lots of tears for me. It can be very lonely and heart wrenching, this new life I live. Nina is now on her 7th week of chemo. She is taking the oral temodar. She is doing very well with this medication. It seems to be the mildest of all the chemo she has received. She is looking forward to having no chemo for the next two weeks. It will be a nice break for her. She continues to attend high school, though much help with the work is needed from me. Soon I will contact a neuropsycholigist to gage Nina's disabilities. My goal is for the psych to help with Nina's defficits as well as give me instruction on how I might be able to help her at home. I also want proffesional help to monitor progress from the psych, and guidance on how I should continue her education. I also plan on looking into programs to involve Nina in so that she can have some kind of social life with kids her age, and possibly with kids that have brain injuries / tumors. Nina's older sister Amber has also been struggling with depression and enxiety attacks. Last week she called me crying five days in a row (this is not like her at all). She will start counseling this weekend and is now taking anti depressants and anxiety medication. It is hard to look at my two oldest daughters and see them hurt so much. I wonder what happened to my family? My heart just aches every single day. Nina receives quite a bit of extra attention on a daily basis. I now see both Amber and Jasmine (Nina's younger sister), becoming envious. I try to give all of my children that special attention they need, soem times it seems like there is not enough of me to go around. I would like to mention the very special doctors and nurses that Nina is so blessed to have. These people are so wonderful. I will be forever grateful to them. The care is incredible. Some very special people have came into our lives. Thank you to each and every one of you.